Glowing In The Dark
by December Camie
Summary: Cardverse AU, a group of short stories set in the same universe as my other story, The Wild Card- #4 'You're my brother, Gilbert. We're family and I'll do anything to make sure that we're a family that stays whole. I won't let us stay separated from each other for the rest of our lives. I'll become part of the part of the Triumvirate and we'll meet again, I'll make sure of it.'
1. Glowing In The Dark

**8/3/2012**

**This is a short story based on and set in the universe of my other story, **_**The **__**Wild Card**_** (cardverse AU). It takes place directly after Kiku Honda is declared Queen of Hearts. For anyone who hasn't read my other story, the flowers Kiku mentions are the Heart Queens' Eternal Implement (magical objects that are specific to each Kingdoms' King, Queen, and Jack, and have special mysterious properties that only their owner has access too. Examples of Eternal Implements: Kiku's flowers, Arthur's clock, Elizaveta's sword, etc). Edited by my beta reader, waterbringer. Requested by and dedicated to the wonderful ScarletteDiscord from DeviantArt who created my first ever piece of fan art for the original story. I hope you like it!**

**I do not own Hetalia.**

-o0o-

_Hearts Castle_

Kiku Honda had never been as scared as he was at this very moment. Actually, terrified might have been a more accurate word. He could not remember ever being as nervous as he was right now. He had to fold his hands in his lap to keep them from shaking.

He took a deep breath and looked upwards toward the wooden ceiling, trying to breathe slowly and evenly. He was purposefully trying to avoid looking at the red flowers lying on the table in front of him. They were the main cause of his worry. Most Hearts citizens would be thrilled upon receiving such a gift, but if he was being honest, Kiku had neither wanted nor needed them. He would have been fine if he had not been chosen, however fate seemed to have a dry sense of humor.

The sound of the door opening was harsh on his ears. He blinked and his eyes flashed to the doorway where a young teenager with caramel colored hair was entering. The door was shut quickly behind him and then there was silence.

The teenager was staring at him with wide eyes. Kiku stood up, moving slowly so as to not scare the other away with any sudden actions. They stayed there like that for a moment, blue sapphires meeting dark brown as the pair gazed at each other.

"Alfred," Kiku finally said when he could no longer tolerate the deafening silence. The teenager blinked at the sound of his name and then with a flurry of movement, he launched himself across the room.

Kiku's eyes flew open and he stumbled backwards with a surprised cry. The second before Alfred reached him, he shut his eyes and held his hands up in front of his face to protect himself.

Hands, softer and warmer than he was expecting, brushed against his arms and flitted over his clothes. Kiku didn't have the time to be surprised before strong arms were surrounding and crushing him into a bone breaking hug. He was almost lifted off the ground by the sheer strength of the other's grip.

"Alfred!" he gasped.

"Are you ok?" Alfred's voice was muffled as he pressed his face against Kiku's hair. "Are you hurt or anything?"

Kiku blinked in confusion. "I'm fine."

"You're not hurt?" came the quiet reply.

"No," Kiku said honestly.

Alfred lowered him so that his feet touched back onto the ground. He kept his hands on Kiku's shoulders and stared into his eyes, searching to see if the other was lying or not.

"You sure?" he asked.

"Of course," Kiku said.

Alfred sighed in relief and released him. "Oh, thank Ace. I was so worried."

Kiku's brow furrowed. "Why? I haven't done anything that could possibly harm me."

"Yes you have! You had the test to see if you're the Queen or not! If you handle the Queen's Eternal Implement wrong, you could get poisoned. You could've died, Kiku. And I- I don't know what I would've done if-"

His voice had started to waver dangerously and Kiku stared at his friend in alarm.

"Alfred, are you crying?" he asked, shocked.

"No!" Alfred protested but his voice cracked. "I'm just tired! I didn't get a lot of sleep last night." He glared at him, but Kiku could see that Alfred's eyes were glossy. He felt his expression soften.

"Alfred- Alfred, listen to me, please," he said and Alfred looked at him.

"I. Am. Fine." He spoke slowly so that the words would land heavy on the teenager's ears. "I'm not hurt, or poisoned, or dying. I am perfectly healthy."

Alfred stared at him for a moment before his face broke out into a brilliant smile. He lurched forward and wrapped his arms around Kiku in another crushing hug. Alfred's shaky laughter echoed in his ears while Kiku opened and closed his mouth like a fish, trying to breathe.

"I'm so glad you're ok," Alfred said after he put Kiku down. "I was really scared."

"I can tell," Kiku said. "But weren't you more curious as to what the results of the test were?"

Alfred smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess, but to be honest I was more worried if you were ok or not. I was really upset when you didn't come back from the Castle last night. I was so worried that I was going to march over here and force them to let me search the place."

"You wouldn't!" Kiku said, aghast. "That's insane, Alfred! What makes you think they would even let you inside the Royal Castle, much less search for me?"

"It would have worked!" Alfred insisted and Kiku shook his head at his friend's foolishness. "But then Castle guards came and I figured they were going to bring me to you anyways. And that meant something _big_ had to have happened so…." His voice trailed off.

"So?" Kiku repeated.

"Well, so that means you had to have been crowned the Queen!" Alfred finished.

"And that doesn't bother you?" Kiku asked.

"Whoa, wait, you mean I'm right? You're the Queen of Hearts?" Alfred's eyes lit up.

"Yes," Kiku said stiffly and was once again engulfed in another hug before he could get another word out. Alfred swung him around in a circle and laughed in joy, squeezing Kiku so tight he thought he might pass out.

"That's so awesome, Kiku!" Alfred's voice was loud and boomed in Kiku's ears. "This is so cool! You're going to be the best Queen in Suit history _ever_!"

"You- you're happy about this?" Kiku asked. He had thought Alfred would be upset upon hearing the information. He had thought Alfred would refuse to talk to him, or even ignore him completely. He had not expected this.

"Duh, of course! My _best friend_ is going to be one of the most powerful rulers in all of the land! How can I not be happy?"

"I thought that you would be mad," Kiku said honestly.

Alfred's brow furrowed. "Why? I think it's really amazing that you're the Queen."

"Well, now I'm going to have to live here, in the Castle. We won't be able to live together in the same house anymore. We won't even be in the same village."

"So? What does that have to do with anything?"

"Alfred!" Kiku said, exasperated. "I'm worried about how I becoming Queen will affect my relationship with you!"

"Oh," Alfred said, his mouth falling open.

"Do you see it now? We won't be able to spend as much time together, if any. I don't even know if I will get to see you at all anymore."

"Why not? You're still Kiku Honda, my best friend. You being Queen isn't gonna change that. I'll come and visit you everyday if I have to."

Kiku smiled sadly. "I'm not sure if they would let you."

Alfred huffed loudly and crossed his arms. "Well too bad for them, whoever 'they' are. You're the Queen here, Kiku, not them. You make the rules now, and there's nothing anyone can say to change that. If you want to spend time with me, who's anyone to tell you otherwise?"

Kiku frowned, thinking over Alfred's words. What he said was true. Kiku could do what he wanted, as long as it didn't harm the Kingdom. And more than anything he wanted Alfred to be by his side while he adjusted to his new life.

It was Alfred for whom he asked when the Royal Deck wanted to know who Kiku wanted to tell the news first. Kiku loved his parents and it was because of them that he became the person he was today. But while his parents had always pushed him to work harder, Alfred showed him that there was more to life than just studying and schoolbooks.

Alfred had _chosen_ Kiku to be his friend. That alone meant more to Kiku than anything his family had done for him. Alfred taught Kiku how to play tag, to catch fireflies on hot summer nights, about cleaning cuts after he had fallen and skinned his knees in the marketplace, on how to stand up to bullies and how to make friends with everyone else. He had shown Kiku so many little and wonderful things that wouldn't seem important to many adults, but it meant the world to a tiny Japanese boy without friends.

Alfred had been there for nearly every part of Kiku's life. His companionship and loyalty was more valuable to Kiku than any crown. And he refused to be Queen if it meant letting Alfred walk out of his life. Kiku wasn't going to give Alfred up to anyone, for anything, _ever_.

He looked up at Alfred, who grinned crookedly, and gave him a small smile of his own. Their friendship would remain intact, he was sure of it. As long as Kiku stayed firm on the issue, the Royal Deck had no right to force Alfred to leave. What Alfred had said was from before was true.

But then again, when had he ever been wrong?

"You're going to have to leave the village," he said to Alfred.

"Yeah, I kinda figured that," Alfred said. "That means I get to stay here with you, right?"

"Yes," Kiku said. "They can't force you to leave; I won't permit it. You're going to stay here- by my side- as long as possible."

"Good. That's the way it should be."

They smiled at each other- Kiku _finally_ content now that he knew Alfred would stay by him and Alfred beaming like he was the happiest person alive.

"Hey, do you know who the King and Jack are yet?" Alfred asked.

"No, I just know that they've been chosen as well. I've been all over the Castle since I passed the test. I haven't even slept-" Alfred frowned at that but Kiku gave a wave of his hand to show it was nothing serious. "Why, do you?"

Alfred nodded happily, his frown disappearing in an instant. "You would never guess who they are, but you'll be really happy once you find out."

Kiku said, "Can you please tell me who it is? I'd rather you tell me than one of the Numbers from the Royal Deck."

"Ok, well, the King is Ludwig Beilschmidt and the Jack is Feliciano Vargas," Alfred said, speaking so fast Kiku had a hard time understanding. "I don't know if I'm right or not, but I _think_ they're the same guys who helped you a few years back when you got lost in the forest. Based on what you told me from before, they look a lot like the two kids who saved you. Do you remember them?"

The names did sound familiar. A long time ago, two boys named Ludwig and Feliciano- a German and Italian- had helped Kiku find his way back to his family after they had been separated while traveling to another town. His family had been extremely grateful to the two children, especially the eight year old Kiku who had felt a strange connection with the strangers. Could they really be the same people from all those years ago?

"I remember," Kiku said. "And I suppose it is possible for them to be the same people. What an odd coincidence."

Alfred shrugged. "Maybe it was fate or something?" he suggested.

"Maybe," Kiku said skeptically. He did not believe in fate. A person made their own decisions and then acted upon those decisions; fate had nothing to do with it.

"Do you want to go meet them?" Alfred asked. When Kiku hesitated, he added, "You might as well; you're not doing anything in here anyways." He looked around the room with a look of disdain, as if the room was too boring to entertain him for long.

"I was _waiting_ for you," Kiku said with a sigh. "But I would like to meet them personally before we are introduced to the Kingdom as the new Hearts Triumvirate. Go ask the guard where the King and Jack are." He nodded towards the door and Alfred scurried off.

He walked over to the table he had been sitting at before and stared down at the pile of flowers on the polished wood. In the dim light, the petals looked as red as blood. He gently picked up the flowers, still unused to the idea that these powerful objects were now at his disposal. From this moment on he would have to carry the flowers around everywhere he went; he couldn't risk the opportunity of someone stealing them. Not that anyone but himself could unlock Tokyo's power, but losing it would still be a serious problem.

His fingers clenched around the fragile stems and his knuckles turned white. He hated everything about this situation. He hated that with these flowers he had the option to kill or save a life.

"Kiku?"

He started and looked up to find Alfred staring down at him. The teenager's brow was furrowed and he looked worried.

"Ah, did you find where they are?" Kiku asked.

Alfred nodded, hesitating. Then he said, "You're gonna be fine, Kiku. You know that, right?"

"I-"

"You will be fine," Alfred repeated, this time with more conviction. "You can handle this, that's why Tokyo chose you. You're smart and brave and you can make the tough choices to save all of Hearts. You're going to be the best Queen Hearts has ever seen."

Kiku smiled, encouraged and warmed by his friend's words.

"I hope you're right, Alfred."


	2. See Right Through My Walls

**9/27/2012**

**I'm adding on another chapter to this because I feel like an awful person for not updating The Wild Card sooner (I'll probably end up adding more chapters onto this whenever that happens in the future).**

**This chapter takes place during Chapter 12 of The Wild Card while Alfred and Arthur are at a party in the Spades Capital Town. Though Alfred mentioned the fact that they danced for a while, I never actually wrote the scene and I never really intended to. But I was listening to the song Arms by Christina Perri (beautiful song by the way) and this is the result, I guess. **

**Again, there is no romance in this story, even if the song that inspired this chapter is romantic.**

**I do not own Hetalia.**

-o0o-

_Spades Capital Town_

Arthur hoped to Ace that Alfred liked what he had done. It wasn't nearly as clean or nice as what Alfred had painted for _him_, but Ace knows he tried. He tried so hard for this boy and his efforts better not have been in vain.

"Huh," he heard Alfred say as he fidgeted. He stared down at the stones beneath his feet as he awaited Alfred's judgment. He kept telling himself that he didn't care what Alfred thought, he didn't even care if Alfred said he hated it. He didn't _care_, Arthur repeated to himself vigorously.

"I-" Alfred began to say slowly, and Arthur winced, expecting the worst. "-love it! Ha ha, Arthur, this is great! I thought you said you were bad at this stuff!"

Arthur sputtered, surprised and secretly pleased by the compliment. "It's not good at all!" he protested. "I messed up the numbers and the hands are all crooked-"

"Psh, as if anyone care about that," Alfred said, rolling his eyes. "_I_ think it's awesome and mine is the only opinion that matters, right?"

"I- I suppose."

"You suppose correctly!" Alfred said with a boisterous laugh before he stood up. "I'm so glad we did this, it was really fun!"

"Well, yes, it was wonderful and all, but now what?" Arthur asked, scowling. Alfred was in charge of what they did, since Arthur had lost the bet. He had no control of anything they did, much to his resentment. He was too used to being in charge; this whole arrangement felt strange and bothersome.

"Er, I'm not sure," Alfred said sheepishly and Arthur rolled his eyes. Of course Alfred didn't know what to do; he had decided to do the face painting on whim. What had made Arthur think that the boy had planned anything?

"There's tons of stuff to do…" Alfred continued to say and his voice trailed off. Arthur turned to look at him curiously. He followed the teenager's gaze to a little bit off where people twirled around a large bonfire.

Immediately he was reminded of the first time they had met, when they had danced and talked at the Gathering. That had been a fun and careless time. Unlike now, when everything reminded him of the dangerous situation that had become of that night.

He felt a warm hand take his and started, looking back to see Alfred smiling at him.

"C'mon, let's go."

Arthur let himself be dragged upwards off his seat by Alfred.

"To dance?" Arthur asked once he was standing.

"Yup. Let's go." Alfred pulled on Arthur's hand and he reluctantly followed.

He had never really loved dancing, not when his red haired cousin, Scott, had first taught him, or at fancy parties or even at the Gatherings. But it was different with Alfred. With Alfred it felt more like gliding instead of stomping, more like flying instead of swinging, more like euphoria than the usual boredom. He could tolerate dancing, even enjoy it, when he had Alfred for a partner.

And it didn't matter how bad he was at dancing; Alfred didn't pay attention to the correct moves or even what kind of dance they were listening to. As Alfred had told him the night of the Gathering, all that was important was the beat. Through the beat Alfred was able to twirl and fly around the dance floor like he was born to do so. It was only because of this natural skill that Arthur could pass as an acceptable dance partner.

And even despite all of this, Arthur was still hesitant to get anywhere near the crowd of dancers.

"This is ridiculous!" Arthur hissed as panic started to set in. He was going to make a fool of himself, he just knew it. "I don't want to dance! Alfred!" He started to resist Alfred's pull, digging the heels of his feet into the ground and trying to twist his hand out of Alfred's grip.

Alfred huffed. "Stop being such a baby; you'll be fine." He tugged on Arthur's arm once and Arthur tripped forward, unable to stop himself. The teenager's strength was incredible.

"But- I- don't- want to!" Arthur redoubled his efforts to escape.

Alfred sighed and stopped walking, though he refused to release his hold on the Queen. "What's the matter? You weren't this freaked out at the Gathering."

Arthur turned red, and looked away. "I- I don't want to go out there and dance, is all."

"Mhm, sure. I think I got that part." Alfred stared at him, twisting his lips into a frown as Townsfolk parted to walk around them on either side. "I wanna know the reason _why_ though. Are you scared or something-?"

"Of course not!" Arthur replied instantly. "I'm not scared of anything!"

"Except dancing," Alfred said, obviously trying to keep a straight face and Arthur bristled.

"I am not scared of dancing!" he snapped and with one strong tug that took the teenager by surprise, finally managed to twist his hand out of Alfred's hold. "I just- I don't think that I'm good at it. I can hardly do the moves the Royal Deck taught me when I became Queen."

The last words came out as a mumble and he could feel his cheeks burning. He felt like a child who didn't know the difference between right and left. He absolutely hated not knowing how to do things, and dancing was definitely one of them.

"Well," Alfred said thoughtfully after a pause. "I think that's the cool part about dancing. You don't have to be good at it to participate. This isn't some fancy meeting or boring dinner party; this is different. This is for fun. _Fun_, Arthur. You don't have to be perfect all the time," he said gently.

Arthur looked up, startled. Alfred must have been more aware than he originally gave the boy credit for; no one had ever picked up on the fact that he was a perfectionist so quickly.

Surely he could trust Alfred with one dance? Arthur had already trusted Alfred not to make a fool of him with the face paint. One dance, he supposed, wouldn't do much to damage his reputation, especially since no one seemed to recognize him here anyway.

"…will you lead again, then?" he asked somewhat gruffly, still embarrassed. "Regardless of what you said, I'm still rubbish at dancing."

Alfred grinned, his whole face lighting up. "That's what you said about face painting, remember? But you did a great job anyways. Stop being so hard on yourself, no one's gonna judge you here. To everyone around us, you're just one in the crowd. You're not the Queen, you're just Arthur. And I'm just Alfred. You don't have to be nervous or anything, dude."

Arthur stared. The words Alfred had said earlier rushed back into his mind:

"_We had fun at the last party we went to together. I want to know if we can still be like that. You know, just Alfred and just Arthur."_

He steeled himself and stood up straight. "Alright then, Just Alfred." He lifted his arm and held his hand out to Alfred. "I believe this means you owe me a dance."

Alfred laughed and took Arthur's hand once more. "I guess I do, huh? C'mon, let's go over there."

He tugged on Arthur's hand and this time the Queen followed without hesitation. It was really amazing, he thought to himself as they passed through the crowd, how just a few words from one Alfred Jones had the ability to put all of his worries at ease. He was completely fine now, not the least bit nervous. Somehow, deep down, he knew that Alfred would never knowingly make Arthur uncomfortable, like he had feared before. He didn't understand how he knew this, but he had no doubts.

"Don't be gentle with me," he growled a little bit after they finally found a free spot on the floor. Alfred was moving noticeably slower, probably so Arthur could follow without stumbling or getting left behind. "If you're going to dance, dance like you want to. Don't let me hold you back."

Alfred raised an eyebrow. "You sure you can keep up?"

"I will try," Arthur said, eyes hard and determined.

Suddenly, an evil smile crossed Alfred's face and the next thing he knew they were moving so fast the world was a blur. Arthur gasped and grabbed onto Alfred as the teenager swung them around the plaza. He hoped people were smart enough to move out of their way, but could do nothing but cling to Alfred while he spun them wildly around like a top.

He felt a thrill of fear in his stomach that was more exhilaration than terror and, to avoid getting dizzy, closed his eyes against the bright colors streaking around them. He let his forehead rest against Alfred's torso and tried to focus on his breathing. Alfred's laughter was loud and joyful in Arthur's ears, and he could feel its vibrations through Alfred's chest.

He smiled to himself. While dancing with anyone else was a boring and dull affair, it was quite the opposite with Alfred. This, he thought to himself, would never ever get old. _Alfred_, his personality and individuality, would never- could never- get old. He was too interesting, too lively, to do so. Somehow, without Arthur even knowing it was possible, Alfred had the ability to highlight the colors in the Queen's black and white life. And it felt…nice, for a change. It felt good. For the first time in a long, long time, _Arthur_ felt good.

And so he let himself be swept around the plaza by the Hearts teenager, with the stars twinkling above like diamonds set against indigo velvet, as Alfred hummed tunelessly in his ears.


	3. Somebody Who Cares

**11/25/2012 **

**So...as far as updates for The Wild Card, I'm almost done with the last part of Chapter 14. I swear. Here's another short story in the meantime!**

**This one takes place years before Alfred and Arthur ever met. I normally don't write about France- I actually don't like him most of the time- but when he's being all considerate and understanding and sweet, I love him. So this chapter is about Francis trying to make Arthur feel better, with him being in the awesome big brother kind of mood that I love.**

**Fun fact: in my mind, this chapter takes place on the same hill as the one where Prussia gave Alfred one of Tokyo's petals at the end of chapter 13. I know that it's kinda hard to tell that, considering I didn't give that much detail on what the hill looked liked in that chapter but, trust me, it's the same one.**

**I do not own Hetalia. Beta'd by waterbringer, as always.**

-o0o-

_Spades Castle Grounds_

Francis found Arthur on top of the hill, where he always was, sitting next to the large oak tree just as the sun was brushing against the horizon. The boy- in truth, he was a teenager but Francis knew it would be years before Arthur reached the maturity to be called anything but a boy- had his legs curled up into his chest, forehead pressed against his knees and his arms wrapped around his shins. He couldn't see Arthur's face, but at the same time, he wasn't sure if he wanted to.

No one liked to see another person in pain.

Francis stopped a few steps away, waiting patiently for the other to speak. As the silence stretched on the breeze picked up, whirling around them and bending the blades of grass like an endless emerald ocean. The wind ruffled Arthur's short blond bangs against his knees and blew Francis' golden locks around his face.

Finally, Francis sighed loudly and shook his head. If Arthur wasn't going to speak, he would.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked in perfect English as he squinted at the slowly sinking sun, blue eyes narrowed against the glare.

"No," came Arthur's low murmur.

"Are you sure?" Francis spoke again. "It might make you feel better."

There was no response. Francis pursed his lips thoughtfully before coming closer and sitting down next to him. He rested back on the heels of his palms and stared up at the clouds twisting above them.

"Everyone has been searching for you," he said absentmindedly. "You really should tell someone before you go running off on your own."

"They don't care about me," Arthur said quietly.

"Of course they do," Francis said, looking at him sideways even though Arthur couldn't see him. "You're going to be the Queen, after all. They _have_ to care about you. "

Arthur's snort was muffled. "Right. How could I forget?" he said sarcastically.

"Oh, don't be like that, my friend," Francis said, sounding almost sympathetic. "It's not so bad really, once you get used to everything."

At this, Arthur's head snapped up and he glared at the Diamond with glossy green eyes. "How would you know?" he snapped. "You're not a Queen and you are definitely not a Spade! You don't know what it's like to be in my position! You don't know _anything_ about how I feel!"

He went back to burying his face between his knees and avoiding Francis' gaze. Francis chewed the inside of his check, trying his best not to say something he would later regret. Arthur had a unique talent of bringing out the worst of him sometimes. But now could not be one of those times; Arthur needed him, whether or not the stubborn Spade would admit it.

"I apologize," Francis said after a minute. "That was a bit harsh of me."

He could practically feel Arthur seething next to him, refusing to speak. Anger was probably only one of many emotions running through him, along with hurt and pain.

"I didn't mean what I said before," Francis continued to speak. "The people at the Castle do not worry about you because they have to; you are a good person, Arthur. People care about you because you are Arthur Kirkland, not just because you will be their Queen."

A moment of silence. Then, "You think so? Honestly?"

"I _know_ so," Francis said firmly. "Even _I_ like you, and you drive me crazy most of the time."

Arthur laughed shakily and raised his head to look at Francis. His eyes were red and puffy. "I'll take that as a compliment, you know. Driving you crazy is what I strive for daily."

"Of course, I wouldn't expect otherwise." He watched as Arthur furiously rubbed the corners of his eyes, feeling an inward pang of guilt. He looked away towards the sunset and tried to enjoy the feeling of the sun's rays on his skin. Arthur, now resting his chin on the tips of his knees, followed his gaze and his expression softened.

"What is it like?" Arthur asked as the sun began to disappear behind the hills of trees. "To be the King?"

"You mean, what is it like to protect thousands of people's lives at the expense of your own happiness?" Francis said, raising an eyebrow. He laughed lightly when Arthur threw him a scathing look.

"You know what I mean," Arthur said.

"Yes, I suppose I do," Francis said, quieting his chuckles. "Despite what you have heard, it's not so bad. You get everything you could ever need or want, hundreds of people waiting on your every word, and everyone's adoration without having to lift a finger."

"You still don't sound so happy about all of that," Arthur commented.

Francis shrugged. "It's an amazing life; you would have to be insane to be unappreciative for what you are given."

"But?"Arthur prompted.

"But, it is also difficult," Francis admitted. "And lonely at times. There are so many choices weighing down on your shoulders, so many decisions you must make for the good of your people. Once you become a member of the Triumvirate, your life no longer belongs to you. It belongs to the Kingdom." He could feel Arthur's gaze on his face but he refused to look away from the sky.

"Well, at least I don't have to worry about being lonely," Arthur said dryly. "I've always been alone; it won't be any different now."

Francis looked at him sharply only to find the teenager staring down at the grass, eyes hard. "Arthur," he said, his voice trailing off. He didn't know what to say.

"It's okay, you know," Arthur said gruffly. "I'm used to it by now. I- I'll be fine." He bit his bottom lip, eyes starting to gloss over again before squeezing his eyes shut.

"You won't be alone," Francis said softly.

"Oh, yes?" Arthur shook his head back and forth, and reopened his eyes to stare hopelessly at the Diamond. "How can you be so sure?"

"You'll have your Triumvirate and your Royal Deck to help you. And, of course, your King."

Arthur raised his impressive eyebrows tiredly. "My King? Please," he scoffed. "He hasn't even shown up yet."

"Or she," Francis reminded him. "But whoever your King will be, he or she will always be there for you. That's the one person who will never abandon you."

"That sounds…." Arthur's brow furrowed. "Oppressive."

Francis chuckled good-naturedly. "It may seem that way to you, but I assure you it is the most wonderful relationship I have ever had the luck to be a part of."

Arthur stared. "Really? You? And Lili? The innocent young girl with the protective older brother? I didn't think she was your type, Francis."

Francis was affronted. "No, you don't understand, Arthur! I would never date Lili; it is not like that between us."

"But you just said-"

"Yes, I know what I said, but that's not what I _meant_. I love Lili like a sister- more than a sister, actually- but at the same time, she is more valuable to me than any lover. She is the most important person in the world to me, but," He shook his head. "I could never kiss her, or marry her. I cannot see her like that. But know that I would die for her in a heartbeat; do not doubt my love for her."

"I don't understand you sometimes," Arthur said, pursing his lips. "But then again, you're talking about the United Bond, aren't you? I don't think I'll know what you mean about your relationship with Lili until I have a King." He looked down at his hands, twisting his fingers through the blades of grass.

"You will find your King," Francis reassured him gently, feeling a sense of fondness for the younger male. "And he or she will help you, I promise. Even your Jack, Yao Wang, will be there to help you make the difficult decisions. You won't be alone."

Arthur nodded, but Francis could tell he wasn't convinced.

"You will understand in time, Arthur," Francis said firmly. "One day you will know what it is like to live your life for people who you will never meet, and know what it means to love and truly understand someone more deeply than you could have ever thought possible. If nothing else, trust me on this."


	4. I Can't Go Back

**2/9/2012 **

**This chapter takes place long before Ludwig became King and everything else should be understandable through reading. Starring, Gilbert and Ludwig.**

**This chapter is for the reviewer ****Vespasta**** who wanted to see something with the Jokers, specifically Gilbert. I already had this in mind so sorry if it's a little sadder than you expected it to be. I hope you like it anyways! **

**I do not own Hetalia.**

-o0o-

_Somewhere in Hearts_

If Gilbert was being honest, he would say that he liked being Prussia, one of the two Jokers in the entire land. He liked his awesome powers because, seriously, who wouldn't want to be able to disappear and transport at will? He liked being unique and standing apart from the Kingdoms that had betrayed him. And he truly and honestly loved Peter, not only because he had practically raised the adorable brat, but also because he was the only person in the whole world who understood what he was going through.

But then there were other times when he would say that he _despised_ being a Joker with every fiber in his being. He hated that he was alone; that these powers and responsibilities had been forced onto him when he had least needed them. Especially since he really had no choice about any of it at all.

And the thing he hated most of all about being a Joker was the fact that it had forced him to be separated from his little brother, Ludwig. His brother's screams still echoed in his nightmares, so clear and precise that Gilbert could relive the night he had been removed from Hearts in perfect detail.

It had been a nice day, contrary to what many might think. There had been no clouds to close off the sun's rays and Gilbert and Ludwig had spent the entire day in the fields practicing swordplay. Gilbert had let Ludwig sit on his shoulders as they walked home in the light of the setting sun.

He even remembered thinking that he wouldn't change this –being with Ludwig and watching him grow up- for anything in the world. Who cared that he had been rejected by all three of the Hearts Eternal Implements? Who wanted to be a King in a stuffy old castle anyways? He would much rather be here, in the fresh air with the comfortable weight of his younger brother on his shoulders as he hummed a random tune on his way home. This- here, in this moment- surely, this was where he was meant to be.

He hadn't even known that his Tattoo had changed yet.

They had been eating dinner when the soldiers had come. The knock on the door had been a shock- they didn't get many visitors- but the armed men had been even more so.

"Sir, are you Gilbert Beilschmidt?" said the one in the front in German when Gilbert opened the door.

He gaped openly at them for a moment before shutting his mouth with a snap. He shifted just slightly in the doorway, hiding the room beyond and specifically Ludwig from view. "Yes? Is there something you need?"

"We must speak to you urgently about something, sir. In private would be most desired." His dark eyes flickered over Gilbert's shoulder to where Ludwig was probably standing. Gilbert stiffened, feeling a thrill of dread in the pit of his stomach. Whatever was going on wasn't good.

"Of course," he replied as calmly as he could. He took a step forward onto the porch and began to shut the door when he paused.

"Ludie," he called over his shoulder. "Keep eating and don't come outside. I'll be back in a second."

He didn't wait for an answer, knowing that Ludwig would only respond with a silent nod. He quietly shut the door and took a deep breath before going over to talk to the soldiers.

Needless to say, he hadn't been expecting the information he had received. He had less than a day to collect any personal belongings and get the hell out of Hearts. No, he wouldn't need food or water. He wouldn't be needing anything like that where he was going. And if he didn't- if he thought he could just pack up and move somewhere else in Hearts, well, he was wrong. They would find him, no matter where he went. They would find him and forcibly remove him, whether he liked it or not.

Gilbert remembered thinking in disbelief, all of this, all because of something as simple as a marking on his skin had changed, and his world had been turned on its head.

He was shocked, of course. Who wouldn't be? Learning that you were one of the two Jokers in the whole land wasn't something you heard every day. But he did what he had to do to prepare himself; he packed what little precious possessions he thought he might need, cleaned up their home to the best of his abilities and tried his best to properly say goodbye to the only home he had ever known.

It was only mid-afternoon the next day when he realized that Ludwig couldn't come with him.

Ludwig, his precious, wonderful, quiet and serious younger brother would be on his own from this day on. Gilbert wouldn't be there to watch over him anymore. Ludwig would have to learn how to take care of himself, how to hunt and trade in the market, to travel long distances and survive military training, all without Gilbert there to watch over and protect him. And that knowledge alone was enough to crush Gilbert's heart, more effective than any bullet or arrow.

In the end the soldiers had to come to the house to drag him away. Surprisingly, Gilbert had been the more composed and silent of the pair for the first time since Ludwig had been born. Ludwig, on the other hand, had screamed as if his hand was being chopped off. He kicked and punched and fought tooth and nail against the soldiers restraining him, refusing to give up or give in. He fought with a fury that would have impressed Gilbert had he not known the reason behind Ludwig's actions.

"_NO!_" Ludwig shrieked, blue eyes glossy and cheeks red as he strained against the two men holding him in place. "No! Gilbert, no! You can't leave me!"

Gilbert watched, pale faced and silent, unable to comfort his brother due to the soldiers standing around him.

For a moment Ludwig stared at Gilbert, tears streaming down his face, before slumping in his captor's arms, all of his energy spent. He let out a broken sob. "You can't leave me…"

Gilbert's eyes stung and his throat felt like it was on fire. He blinked rapidly and he held back a sob of his own. Oh, Ace, he didn't want to go. He just wanted to stay here in this remote town in Hearts with his brother, the only family he had left. And to see Ludwig, the most important person in the world to him, on his knees, defeated and broken like this- it shattered something inside of Gilbert permanently.

Gilbert turned to the three men standing behind him, waiting to grab him by the arms if he tried to make a run for it.

"Please," he said to the leader, his voice cracking slightly. "Please, give me five minutes with him. Just to say goodbye. Please. I promise I won't run away or anything, just let me speak with him."

"Three minutes," the leader said grudgingly and hope leaped in Gilbert's chest. "No more, no less. Men!" He made a hand gesture and the soldiers released Ludwig, who instantly collapsed to the ground.

The soldiers began to exit their house as Gilbert ran over to his brother. He fell to his knees, saying in a hushed whisper, "Ludwig!" He tried to pull the boy into a sitting position. Ludwig was breathing heavily and he clung to Gilbert's arms almost desperately.

"Gilbert," Ludwig whimpered and met Gilbert's red eyes. "Please, please don't go. I don't want you to leave me." His small hands tightened their hold.

Gilbert hugged Ludwig to his chest and pressed his cheek into Ludwig's soft blond hair. "I don't want to go either," he said as gently as he could. "Do you honestly think I would leave you if I had a choice?"

"No," Ludwig sniffed.

"Exactly. But-" He gently pulled away and looked sternly at Ludwig. "-I don't _have_ a choice. It wasn't me who changed my Tattoo." He paused and cast a look at the shut door.

"I don't have a choice," he said again lowly and looked back at his brother. "But if I did, I would have stayed with you. I want you to always remember that."

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Ludwig's forehead: a goodbye kiss.

"Hey, don't cry," he said softly as Ludwig began to shake uncontrollably. "It's okay; you're going to be fine. Here, let me give you something to remember me by."

He reached around his neck and lifted a long cord over his head. On the cord hung a black and silver metal pendant, shaped like a cross: the Iron Cross. It shone white in the low light and Ludwig sucked in a breath at the sight of it, sky blue eyes going wide. Gilbert smiled slightly then placed the necklace around Ludwig's neck, letting the pendant drop against the smaller boy's chest.

"Gilbert," Ludwig breathed, touching the pendant in awe. "Is this-?"

"The Beilschmidt family heirloom created when our great, great Uncle Frederick became King of Hearts all those years ago?" Gilbert grinned at the expression on Ludwig's face. "It totally is. Isn't it awesome?"

Ludwig opened his mouth to speak but a loud knocking interrupted him.

"Hurry up in there!" said a gruff voice. Ludwig shot the door a terrified look. As he turned the pendant caught the light and was suddenly illuminated. Gilbert stared at it and suddenly a brilliant idea hit him, causing hope to flutter in his chest.

"Ludwig," Gilbert said, somewhat forcibly, and Ludwig faced him again. "I want you to listen to me, alright? I have to go away soon but if you do something very important we may be able to meet again in the future."

Ludwig's eyes were huge. "Really?"

"Yes, really. But it would be very difficult and very hard," Gilbert said cautiously. "It wouldn't be easy, Ludwig."

"I don't care what I have to do!" Ludwig grabbed Gilbert's hands. "As long as we're together again, that's all that matters. What do I have to do?"

Gilbert hesitated only for a brief second before saying, "The only people Jokers are allowed to have contact with are the Triumvirates of the Kingdoms. So that means, in order for us to meet again-"

"I would have to become a member of the Hearts Triumvirate?" Ludwig guessed quickly.

Gilbert blinked, a little startled at how fast Ludwig had come up with the answer. "Uh, yeah. That's right. _But_-" he said forcibly when Ludwig opened his mouth. "-it would be a ton of work, Ludwig. You would be in charge of an _entire Kingdom_. You would have to learn the ways of the government and you would have to read a lot of pointless books and how to use magic-"

"Magic?" Ludwig interrupted curiously.

"Yeah. To use the Eternal Implement or whatever, you know?"

"Oh. But none of that matters, Gilbert!"

"Oh yeah?" Gilbert raised his eyebrows. "And why would you think that? Running a Kingdom kind of matters, Ludie."

"Well, no, I didn't mean it like that."

"Then how did you mean it?"

Ludwig took a deep breath. "It doesn't matter how much work it would take to rule Hearts or to wield an Eternal Implement. It doesn't matter if I become the King, Queen or Jack as long as I get chosen at all. The only thing that would matter in the end-" His lips began to tremble and his eyes turned glossy. "- the only thing that would matter would be that we would be able to meet again."

And here he gave Gilbert a brave but painful smile. "You're my brother, Gilbert. And I'll always love you and want to be with you again because of that. We're family and I'll do anything to make sure that we're a family that stays whole. I won't let us stay separated from each other for the rest of our lives. I'll become part of the Triumvirate and we'll meet again, I'll make sure of it."

Ludwig abruptly lurched himself forward and Gilbert opened his arms just in time to catch him.

"I love you so much, Gilbert!" Ludwig half cried, pressing his face into Gilbert's chest and wrapping his arms around his older brother.

Gilbert rubbed Ludwig's back in slow circles, doing his best to murmur words of comfort. His throat was burning and he had a hard time holding back tears of his own. He was moved by Ludwig's speech; normally Ludwig was closed off from his emotions, or at least extremely shy. But it was times like these, when Ludwig truly showed the depth of his love for his brother, that Gilbert knew he had to be doing something right.

The door banged open suddenly and the six soldiers from before came bustling back into their house.

"Time is up," said the leader, who was standing in front.

Gilbert gave Ludwig one last fleeting hug and kiss before he was pulled away. Ludwig gave out a loud cry and moved toward Gilbert before two of the soldiers forcibly restrained him.

"I love you, Ludwig!" Gilbert yelled as the soldiers began to push him out the door. "Never forget that, even if we never see each other again!"

A look of pure panic and terror crossed Ludwig's already horrified expression and he began to struggle harder against the soldiers' hold on him. He cried out, "Gilbert-!"

A second later Gilbert had been shoved out the door as it slammed shut behind him. He never got to hear the rest of Ludwig's sentence.

He stumbled down the stairs of the porch, still in shock at what had just happened. He just couldn't accept the fact that he would never see Ludwig again. But, he told himself firmly, if Ludwig could do what he said he would- if he really did succeed in becoming a member of the Triumvirate-

"Sir Beilschmidt?"

The voice pulled him abruptly out of his thoughts. "Er, yeah?"

"Please, if you will." The leader gestured toward a group of horses standing nearby. There were six for the soldiers and one extra, probably for Gilbert.

He felt a thrill of anxiety rake through him. Where were they going to take him? He had guessed somewhere out of Hearts, but where exactly was that? He wanted to ask, but seeing the stern looks from the soldiers, Gilbert kept his mouth shut and climbed on top of a horse.

"What about the other three?" Gilbert asked and the two soldiers and the leader mounted their own steeds.

The leader said, "They will remain with your brother until we return to collect them. We cannot risk the chance of him following after you."

"They won't hurt him, right?!" Gilbert shot a desperate glance back towards the house.

"No. They are Heart soldiers. We do not harm our own kind."

The leader made some kind of strange noise and all of the horses- except the three belonging to the men inside- started to move forward. Gilbert wondered distantly, if they do not harm Hearts, what will they do to me? Technically he was no longer a Heart, so what were they planning to do with him?

It was a long ride. Longer than he would have expected, at least. By the time they had stopped the sun was starting to rise.

"Where are we?" Gilbert asked warily, taking a long look around. It wasn't anyplace interesting; there was a small creek in front of them, small and shallow enough to pass through, and beyond that was a forest. It looked harmless enough, but there was something about the lack of noise coming from the trees that made the hair on Gilbert's neck rise unpleasantly.

"No-Man's-Land," the leader said solemnly.

"What? Why are we here?" Gilbert had never seen No-Man's-Land before. From the stories he had heard, he had expected some kind of freaky mystical enchanted forest. Sure, this forest was creepy but there was nothing specific about it that made it seem particularly threatening. It looked like any kind of forest in Hearts; what made this one so special?

"This is where we were told to deposit you," the leader said. "You will go into the forest and alone and we will stay here long enough to make sure you get in safely. Then we shall travel back to your brother's town to collect our men before returning to the Castle."

Gilbert gaped at him. "You're going to leave me here? Alone? With _nothing_? What kind of Hearts soldier would leave someone to walk into No-Man's-Land without so much as a weapon to defend himself-"

"It is our job," the leader said with equal amounts of firmness and gentleness. "It is not my- nor the others- decision to cast out people such as yourself. Namely we are loyal servants to our Triumvirate. This is something you, a once Heart, should understand."

Gilbert was taken aback. The soldier sympathized with him, that much was certain, but he was loyal to Hearts and could no more let Gilbert go than stop breathing. The soldier had said that Gilbert would understand this, and he did. But regardless, it caused his heart to ache to think that he was no longer a citizen of a place he had called home.

He was an outcast.

Stiffly, he dismounted the horse he had been riding with stinging eyes and led the animal over to the leader.

"So, what? I just walk straight into the forest?" He nodded towards the trees as he handed over the reins.

"Yes. We will make sure that you make it into the forest safely before we depart." The leader took the reins from him.

"And I go there with nothing? No food, no water, no weapons- with _nothing_?"

"Nothing." The leader paused. "But we will give you the possessions you brought."

He snapped his fingers at one of the others and the soldier tossed Gilbert his pack. Gilbert caught it with a loud "oof!" and stumbled back a step. It took a moment, but he was able to put his arm through the string and secure it onto his back.

"Well." Gilbert fidgeted uncomfortably while the three men watched him. "Thanks, I guess. Wish me luck."

He turned his back, but the leader called out to him one last time, saying, "I would wish you luck if I thought you needed it. But I have a feeling that you will be just fine on your own. You are a Joker, after all. No-Man's-Land is your true domain."

Gilbert hesitated for a moment but nodded his thanks. Then he turned away from the soldiers and began to walk towards the creek. He didn't know if he believed the leader or not but it didn't really matter at this point. He was traveling into No-Man's-Land alone, unarmed and unprepared for what may happen to him.

But he was Gilbert Beilschmidt, so he held his head high, turned his back on everything he had ever known with his dignity still intact and walked into the forest.

He didn't look back.


End file.
